Faraday to Henry Holland   2 December 1835

Royal Institution | 2 December 1835 | 10. clk

My dear Sir

Your letter¹ distresses me for I thought that mine to Lord Holland² would have intimated that I was willing to do all I ought to do to relieve others from inconvenience (though in no way the cause of it) but that I durst not in doing so place myself in a false and dangerous position. This I should be doing were I to proceed without Sir James South[.] The affair is actually more his than mine he is more concerned in the matter & knows more about it than I do; his character is as much at stake as mine; he has been accepted by Lord Melbourne through you as my representative. I am willing to do any thing which he & you may advise for I feel sure that neither would propose what I could not assent to. Let me then say distinctly that I can not take a single step in this affair without him & that it is with him & not with me that Lord Melbournes friends should communicate[.] Let me pray you therefore to communicate Lord Hollands letter (which I return) to him and I shall wait until you two tell me what to do[.]

Excuse me my dear Sir for speaking plainly in this matter but I perceive that unless I do so very serious consequences may arise[.] The Pension is a matter of indifference to me but other results some of which have already come to pass are not so[.] The continued renewal of this affair to my mind & that in a manner hesitating, dilatory, & changeable is not consistent with my feelings and tempts me at times to what might be thought very ungenerous under the circumstances namely even at this late hour a determined refusal of the whole.

Trusting however that all these difficulties will vanish upon your communicating with Sir James South

I am My dear Sir | Your truly grateful & | Obliged | M. Faraday

Endorsed by Faraday: Copy of mine to Dr Holland 2nd Dec Evg 1835