From Thomas Archer Hirst   Janry 11th 1857

Pau | 14 Rue de la Mairie | Jan^ry 11^th 1857

My dear John,

(1 P.M.) To day is a dark day for me in every sense of the word. Outside it is stormy, the wind howls and causes the shutters of the windows in every house in the street to flap angrily against the walls. The rain which instead of falling is driven before the wind beats furiously against the windows. The smoke instead of ascending the chimney is driven down by gusts and the fire almost blown out. Worst of all my poor suffering wife¹ lies close to me in bed breathing with difficulty and able to speak only in whispers. We feel that some crisis is approaching. John Martin is also with us but—in this moment of anxiety I naturally take up my pen to write to you rather than talk to him in order to prevent that tendency of mine to ponder too much over misfortunes present and to come.

Up to the close of the past year Anna appeared to be improving wonderfully we were all in good spirits The only drawback to our contentment was the bad health of John Martin, who suffers frequently from bad attacks of Asthma. But at the commencement of this year and in spite of all our precautions we fear that Anna caught fresh cold. At any rate she has been very very poorly ever since. Of course her strength had been diminishing for a long time, nor even before this last attack could we see that she was gaining strength although her cough was certainly improving and her appetite good. Our lodging² is on the first floor, when we first came to Pau³ she could ascend the stairs by herself without very much fatigue. For the last month, however, I have always had to carry her up. Such being her weak state before you may imagine how this new attack has prostrated her. She can with difficulty walk across the floor, every cough exhausts her, she pants for breath afterwards and feels a terrible oppression of her chest. The doctor comes daily now and to day will come twice bringing another physician with him to try if together they can succeed in relieving her. The difficulty is to relieve the oppression on her chest by counter-irritants, and the fear is that by employing such measures they may weaken her too much. What the result will be God only knows. The Doctor does not say there is any imminent immediate danger, but for my part I fear another week like the one she has suffered through would leave her with very little more strength. These, however, are my own fears merely. I console myself by the thought that the Doctor considers her condition less serious that I do.

(9 P.M.) The doctors have had their consultation and both assure me that they do not think there is immediate danger. Their opinion is that she will rally from this attack but that she is in a very precarious condition. It appears to be certain now that both lungs are diseased. Thus although they have somewhat relieved me from present anxiety these doctors have darkened my future prospects. For a long time I had clung to the hope that with one lung comparatively sound, with care, and the beneficial influence of climate she might bear up and improve. Of this old hope but little now remains.

This evening she is a little better I hope and think she is past the worst. Her bedroom opens into our sitting room. I lifted her out of bed a while ago wrapped her in blankets and carried her to the fire in order to let her bed be made afresh. She enjoyed the little change for three-quarters of an hour, during which time I played for her on the piano. I have carried her to bed again she feels no worse but better, and I trust she will sleep quietly. Should any change occur I will write a line immediately. If you hear nothing you may interpret my silence favourably. I have scarcely any inclination to write on other subjects had I such to write about. My spare time I devote as usual to my mathematical work in which I am making some progress but I cannot say much. I am in the midst of difficulties and as fast as I conquer them others rise. One thing is certain my subject increases in breadth as I work at it and will surely be worth something when I have done with it.

But it is long since I heard of or from you. I have looked forward to receiving a Phil. Mag. for the last two months, thinking I should there hear of you, but none has arrived. I wrote some time ago to Francis telling him to send me the last two numbers, but strange to say they have not yet come to hand. Tell him this if you please.

I have not the time to write another letter tonight so perhaps you will have the goodness to send this to Wright. Although it contains bad news I know both M^r and M^rs Wright⁴ would be sorry to be kept in ignorance of this unfortunate change in Anna’s health. Write soon to

Yours affectionately | T.A. Hirst.

RI MS JT/1/H/230

RI MS JT/1/HTYP/485–6